Can we just take a moment to breathe. To take a break from all the holiday fuss. 10 days until 2015. The year flew by so fast.
This year has been nothing but a hectic roller coaster for me. It’s had it’s high an low points, but I’m so glad it’s finally almost over. It’ll be a new year in a new place, and hopefully I’ll be blessed enough not to have to be bounced around anymore.
3 days til Christmas Eve. That’s what I’m not ready for. All the people an the fuss, that’s the shit that gives me anxiety. I don’t know how I’m gonna deal with it.
Ok yes I’m aware it’s been like two weeks. This holiday shit, and everything else that’s going on right now has drove me a lil bit wonky.
Long story short I haven’t been writing. I’ve wanted to, but when I go to actually do the writing I feel like I’m just way to tired to do anything.
Although I haven’t completely slacked off, I’ve been doing a shit ton of research. I’ve watched interviews an read articles an all that good stuff. Being that my project is fantasy, I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to outline. And make a map.
So that’s gonna be my writing life for the next week or so. I’m fairly confident that I can blaze through outling, it’s figuring out the map part that’s got me all discombobulated over here. We will see my dears!
So yesterday I went on a little trip with my AJROTC class to Arlington National Cemetery. Let me just say it was such a great experience to be a part of.
Here are some pictures!
I was raised by my grandfather, and he was a sailor so it had a special place in my heart.
Arlington is just so much bigger then I thought, and while beautiful it’s a tragedy at the same time. For all of those men an woman to have died, but it only makes me feel that much more thankful for their services.
I’m 16. I’m a teenage girl who’s been through more then my share of shit I didn’t deserve, but I still somehow manage to get through it all.
But at the end of the day I just want someone to give me a reason to stop running, someone who wants me to stay. I’m so alone in this crazy violent world, and I just wish I wasn’t alone.
Everyday I seem to never get around to having time to write until right before I go to bed. So thinking of that I thought maybe taking a spare notebook with me to school might be the answer.
Yeah not the answer. With honors classes there just isn’t time, and my free block was just as busy. I don’t know, maybe it was just the wrong day to do it. After all it is Monday. I’ll attempt it again tomorrow, and we’ll see how that goes.
But good news! Last night I finally broke 1k last night on this new project I’m working on. I just want to have the time to sit down an have a marathon writing session.
Anyway what are ways you guys squeeze in writing ?
Yeah it’s gonna be here. Soon. I’m not sure I’m ready. All of the people, going out of town, and having 2 weeks off. 2 weeks I’m gonna have to deal with my dad.
To be completely honest I’m not happy where I’m at, but I have no where else to go. So I’m stuck. I’m stuck in a place where I feel like I’ve lost control of my life, and all anyone want to do is make decisions for me.
I just want a happy and stress free life. With the holiday coming I’m gonna be highly stressed. I’m not looking forward to it.
Yes, yes they do. When it comes to boys I feel like I’m drowning, and I hate it. Like is it so hard to just wanna be happy with someone? To have that teenage romance that everyone else has.
My ex that I’m still so infatuated with to the point I think I’m falling in love with him is a selfish asshole. But at the same time he isn’t. Like he has his reasons and at least he was honest about everything. However he left me an still wants to be all over me. It’s emotionally draining, and all I ever seem to do anymore is cry over him. I hate it.
I know, I know. Move on Sara. Yeah, she tried it and the shit didn’t work. They either just want sex or because you have them a side hug in the hallway and said hi you’re moving way too fast. Like come fucking on please.
I’m not a picky girl you know, I don’t ask a lot from people, but relationships just never seem to work for me. It sucks. Boys suck.
So again for the 100th time this week I’m stressing about what college do I wanna go to. It sucks major monkey butt.
I’ll be headed to college in less than 2 years now, and I have to make a decision. Doesn’t help that the college lady at my school is on me like white on rice.
The ultimate goal is med school. So I’m gonna be a biology major by default. I could go to any undergrad school I want with my GPA. I’m just indecisive.
I think getting out of state would be my best bet. I wanna be away from all the drama at home. So I’ve highly considered my dream college WVU. My best friend lives in Morgantown so I’d know someone. However, I think I want a completely new start.
That being said there’s Alabama State, or University of Alaska Fairbanks Campus.
Alabama State would be my last choice. The end game is to be in Alaska, I want to retire there an have my own land. So in retrospect it’s one step closer. At least I’d have more of a feel of the area.
I honestly don’t know. For now it’s up in the air, as it gets closer I’m hoping things will fall in place.
Damn these little things called writing sprints. They are scarily addictive. However my dears, they do help out. Like a whole fucking lot. I have almost hit 500 words for the day–I’m like 14 shy– and I’m just like damnnnn. I’m loving them, but I hate them at the same time because I know I’m gonna stay up way too late doing them.
Yes! That quote right there says it all. Stay sending out positive vibes, keep the faith, and have fun through the holidays! Also ya know, write on!